Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Gentle life reminder...

I'm going to a wake for a 29 year old in a couple of hours. Because its upstate, I'm going to meet Full Boat and we're going to go together. Technically, I'm not even supposed to go because of my kohen-ness (according to tradition, I'm a descendent of Aaron and have certain extra rules to follow because of that), but I can't even imagine forsaking my buddy who lost her boyfriend.

29 years old. 1 year older than me.


These things genuinely freak me out though, the idea of hanging out with the body for an hour or two is particularly odd to me. Full Boat made a point of telling me, "Yep, Ruby, this is one of things you guys got right. You can go to the person's house, where they can be with family and friends, in someplace familiar and comfortable, or you can go to a room, and sit with the deceased."

Knucklehead, while sad for our buddy, noted that this has hit me particularly hard. I guess it got me wondering about mortality, about "doing the things", about the goals and places and people in my life, making sure i'm true to them all and accomplish some good stuff before I head out. I've had some amazing moments (kissing Knucklehead, playing music to a few thousand people, organizing huge rallies, winning slams at the Nuyorican, playing cards with Schedule1, the Boat, HC, Rico and Fearless Reporter, seeing the Yankees win playoff games) and yet at times, I'm not satisfied. Actually, I'm not satisfied a lot. Guess that's something to keep one going, yes?

G-d bless you, wherever you are. DBQgirl loved you all the way, and she misses you terribly. My hope is that, while this life was bumpy for you, you get release, comfort, and peace. And may we all find the way to whatever it is we're looking for.


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7:37 PM  

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