Thursday, February 14, 2008

Flashback! "Neighbors make great lovers!"

The punkasaurus asks, and she receives. Hell, it's almost her birthday, so I'll do the request. From so far back, i'm not actually sure when I wrote it...

Neighbors Make Great Lovers

really make great lovers.

They're friendly, concerned for
your wellbeing

and so damn attractive!

Clearly, they care about the

so they won't besmerch your good name
Or sully you with
A drunken row
or dispute.

Since they live near you,
they know where you're going
for dinner,

and won't take nearly as long to order.

They have a card for your

and if either one of you
has the embarassment of late fees,
the other can use their card to
save face.

You don't have to allow
an hour for the damn
that's under construction.

Also, picking who's place
to relax at

carries not nearly as many

They are a lot easier to surprise visit.

You can easily bring groceries
for dinner to their house.

A booty call can materialize
in Minutes.

If you need alone time,
or get into a fight,
home is just a short walk away,
and you don't have to spend money
on cabfare.

You can be publicly affectionate,
OR be klandestine
in your tryst
by greeting your Luscious partner
with a suuaavve

"Whaddya SAY, neighbor?"
and a hearty pat on the back.

They won't litter,
they won't disrespect your
favorite diner,
claiming their's is much better.

If you both have single roommates,
it's a fantastic way
to give them a hand, and
get them a neighbor lover
of their own.

If you cannot find
a succulent neighbor
to be your lover,
you are clearly at fault.

Please move immediately,

so some fine women will move in
next door to me.


Blogger Yaakov Kirschen said...

I am happily married but this almost makes me wish I were single again.
Dry Bones
Israel's Political Comic Strip since 1973

1:02 PM  

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